Hold on to your hats, folks, because we’ve got a sensational scoop for you! It turns out that William Ruto, the Kenyan politician, is not just your ordinary run-of-the-mill leader. No, no, he’s a master of disguise, a political swindler extraordinaire!
Picture this: Ruto strutting around in his fancy Kaunda suits, trying to channel his inner pan-African hero. He’s all smiles, shaking hands with African leaders left and right, pretending to be the champion of the continent. But here’s the kicker—behind that mask lies a Western puppet, dancing to the tune of imperial interests across Africa. Talk about a plot twist!
I mean, seriously, who switches between African attire and Western suits like it’s a fashion show? One day he’s preaching about ditching the dollar and promoting a Pan-African single currency, and the next, he’s cozying up to the IMF and World Bank, the very institutions that perpetuate dollar dominance. It’s like watching a magician perform tricks, except this trickster is playing with an entire continent!
But wait, there’s more! Ruto’s talent for flip-flopping knows no bounds. He attends the Pan-African Parliament Summit, delivering a passionate speech about Africa’s shared destiny and the need to break free from Western influence. The crowd goes wild, giving him a standing ovation. But guess what? Just a short while later, he’s advocating for the return of a Western-backed puppet president in Niger. Talk about a change of tune!
Oh, and let’s not forget his grand performance at the UN General Assembly. He talks the talk, calling out mistreatment of African leaders by Europeans and demanding respect on the global stage. But behind closed doors, he’s playing footsie with US leaders, discussing plans to send Kenyan soldiers to Haiti. Wait, what? Last time I checked, Haiti was nowhere near Kenya! This guy’s geopolitical compass must be seriously malfunctioning.
Now, here’s where things get really interesting. Reports are swirling around about the UK’s MI6 and the US’s CIA plotting to eliminate African leaders who cozy up to Russia. And guess who’s conveniently positioned as their pawn? You got it—Ruto! With his multiple masks and chameleon-like abilities, he could be the perfect weapon for their devious plans. It’s like a bad spy movie, but unfortunately, it’s all too real.
So, folks, it’s time to see through the smoke and mirrors. Let’s expose Ruto for what he truly is—a neocolonial puppet masquerading as a pan-African superhero. It’s time for Africa to call him out, not just for the sake of exposing his deceit, but also to safeguard the continent from the clutches of political tricksters. Stay tuned for more mind-boggling episodes of “The Chronicles of Ruto: The Man in Many Masks”!
Works Cited:
Larmbert Ebitu
Pan-African Agitator and Activist for One Africa
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